EU - the aftermath

Well. We royally fucked that up didn't we?

I woke up at 5am and usually when I wake up at some stupid hour, I simply roll over and go back to sleep. But I remembered that it was results day so I reached for my phone. When I was met with the sweaty and manically grinning face of Nigel Farage over the heading "Britain votes to leave the EU" I had a surge of adrenalin that went right down to my legs. It that moment, my primal fight or flight instinct kicked in and told me to run.

I knew I wouldn't get to sleep again after that so I went downstairs and sat by the window, coffee in hand feeling utterly betrayed by the country I've called home my entire life.

So what now?

Will there be redundancies at Dan's work? Will his job be safe if so? Is this the start of the end for my shop? Are our plans to move now shot to pieces? And don't even get me started on what this will mean for Alessi's future.

One of the worst things about this is the not knowing. The limbo we now find ourselves in, regardless of which way we voted.
I keep reading the news and that seems to be a mistake. It's just more opinions, more questions. The petition I and millions of others signed, now appears to have been 'hijacked' by well meaning non-British citizens. I'm sure their intention was good, but all they've managed to do is undermine what could have been a powerful message for Parliament from the British people. Maybe it was a long shot anyway, but it was one that gave me hope.

One thing that does make me very happy is that Alessi is too young to understand all this. Last Friday was no different from any other Friday and her biggest annoyance at the moment is that it's raining and she wants to let the chickens out.

So for now the answer to all my questions is the same. Wait and see.

And in the meantime I will endeavour to carry on as normal.

EU nerves

Hello my friends. How're you this fine Wednesday evening?

I'm doing ok, but I'm also in a weird limbo which is leaving me feeling slightly unsettled. And it's all down to this EU referendum hoo ha. First off, I am so sorry for making you have to read that phrase for the kabillionth time. I have severe referendum fatigue and if I could turn it all off and just tune in on Friday morning to find out the outcome, I would.*

First off, I hate what this effing referendum has done to our country. It's brought out the worst in people and fuelled a xenophobic atmosphere which will linger even if we do vote to stay in Europe. A woman is dead and while there are those who deny that the referendum had a part to play, I can't see how it didn't.

And then there's how leaving the EU will affect me personally.

It occurred to me today that if it weren't for the EU, Alessi wouldn't be here. Bare with me.
I wouldn't have met my best friend who moved to the UK from the Netherlands. She wouldn't have introduced me to Dan and we wouldn't have gone on to have Alessi.
So I have the EU to thank for my best friend, my partner and my daughter.
That's pretty impressive I think.

Then there's the other love of my life. The Dress Tree. My humble cottage business that I started when nobody took me seriously. I was advised against it as Alessi was only a year old at the time and "when would I get the time to sew anyway?" Three years later and I've silenced my critics.
But what if we come leave Europe? Well who knows? Literally. No one seems to know. It could be ok. Things might slow down for a little while and then recover. Or the shit might hit the fan at great speed and I may find myself having to close the shop down, just when it was getting to a point when I could start paying myself a regular wage. I believe in some circles, that is referred to as sod's law.

I'm nervous about the outcome and hoping with all my might that we don't fuck this up.

*I've already voted so I'm bored of all the rambling now. And yes, my own included!

Meet the chickens!

It was only a matter of time.

I've been playing with the idea of getting chickens again for some time, but kept finding reasons why we couldn't do it. Then one day, Dan came back from the car boot sale saying that a man there had been selling bantam chickens. He had nearly bought some as a surprise, but thought better of it when he realised we didn't have anything prepared.

And that was it. The same day I pulled out the old chicken coop from the shed and put it back together again. Over the following weeks I bought feed, collected old newspapers and hunted around for local bantam breeders. As luck would have it, there's a wonderful lady who sells all things chicken related just over a mile away. It was a sign. Not that I needed one by this point. 

And so yesterday we jumped in the car and collected our new girls. They're settling in nicely and establishing their new pecking order. Gertie seems to be at the top, followed by Elvis (who's a girl) and of course, little Titch at the bottom. They're still quite young so a little timid. We'll handle them every day and give them treats until they get used to us. Although they've been with us for little more than 24 hours and they appear to have settled in already. 

The only down side is that because of their size (extra diddy), we can't let them roam the garden until it's been chicken proofed. These little girls could easily squeeze under the shed whereas there was no chance my old girls could have managed that. I'm going to have to find some scrap wood from somewhere and get patching. But for now, they're more than happy in the coop, which is the perfect size for three little bantams. 

I'll stop there, but you can expect more chicken spam from me in the future!

My creative cup, it runneth over

I've been on something of a crafting frenzy lately. May has been pretty quiet as far as sewing new things for the shop goes. Which could backfire spectacular as my dress and skirt stock are starting to run a little low. But I promised myself that as soon as my fruity skirts were finished, I'd focus on making a few things for myself before starting on anything new for the shop. Me Made May which I referred to in my last post came at the perfect time and while I don't have many handmade items in my own wardrobe (I'm always on the bottom of the priority list), I took the pledge this year anyway. I figured it would hold me accountable and keep me motivated. Also posting photos on Instagram acts as a record and I'm hoping that next year I'll have even more handmade clothes and will feel a sense of achievement when I look back and see the progress I hope to will have made.

So far this month I've been wearing my leopard print kimono, green Edie dress and my black and gold heart skirt. Although I forgot to take a photo of that last one so I'll have to try again next week. I've also made myself a lovely summer dress which I haven't worn yet because as soon as it was ready, the weather remembered that this was Britain and brought back the rain. So now I'm back in jumpers and the occasional blanket because I'll be buggered if I'm putting the heating on in May.
Next on my list of makes is a pair of pyjama bottoms and I found some fabric which I have fallen hard for. It's wonderfully kitsch, bright, fun and softer than I could have imagined. PERFECT! I can't wait to see the end result.

And once you start getting creative in one area of your life, it appears to spread in to others without you even realising it. It's like a tap that you can't switch off.

While playing with Alessi and her Hama beads (will her love for these ever die?!) I made a very bright garland for the conservatory window. This in turn prompted her to want to take all her bead creations out of the box and hang them on her bedroom wall.

Then there's the garden and we've been planting all sorts of plants in to all sorts of things. Sunflowers in my old wellies, Geraniums in Alessi's old wellies, a purple plant in one of Dan's old trophies, you get the idea.

I bought a jasmine plant from the local garden centre, stuck it in a hanging basket and hung it above My Spot. 

Speaking of hanging baskets I replaced the rotted and broken willow ones and filled them with the old strawberry plants. Some had died off over winter (that will teach me to leave them out) so I topped them up with new plants.

Now we're nearly set for the summer. All I need now is to work out exactly which herbs and salad leaves I want to grow in the raised bed and we're done. Maybe.

Oh and something else too! Anyone who knows me knows that I HATE cooking. Really, I loathe it. I'm no good at it and Dan will attest to this (I once gave him food poisoning with salad leaves).
Anyhoo our food shopping bill has been creeping up lately and we've been struggling to keep it to the £70 a week budget.  I'd heard of Jack Monroe's first cookbook and recalled that they had only ever been raving reviews. I took another look and before I knew it, I'd purchased a copy.

I don't regret it. It's amazing. Jack's kind of cooking is right up my street. I don't go in for pretentious ingredients and lots of faffing. Cooking still isn't my thing, but I want to be able to make decent, healthy meals for Dan and Alessi, without too much faff and without spending a stupid amount of money. With the help of this book I'm starting to check all of those boxes and I personally think that's pretty bloody impressive. Our last shop came just under our £70 budget and the week before that we didn't even come close to it! And yet we all ate well and enjoyed our treats.
We're in that stage of trying some of the recipes out to see what works and what doesn't for us, tweaking them where necessary. But no other cookbook I've come across has managed to inspire me to even try. So as you can tell, I'm a huge fan.

And as if that weren't enough, we've also been getting creative with the house too. We're focusing our energy on our living room at the moment. It hasn't been painted since we moved in ten years ago. Damp walls and a growing toddler all took it's toll. Earlier this year me and Alessi pulled down the wallpaper. The damp had been so bad that it just peeled away. So there were marks where the paint underneath had come away with the wallpaper. On another wall there were crayon scribbles for a certain someone. And on another wall there are still the greasy hand prints also made by a certain someone with her cheese covered mitts. On the one hand, I feel like these are memories that we'll be painting over and it makes me sad. On the other, I hate the fag-stained colour we currently have and that makes me sadder so I also welcome fresh, crisp white!

So, where was I going with this? Oh yes. Dan booked a day off with the intention of painting the whole room. He did one wall and then decided to rip up the living room carpet instead. I was at work. It could have gone so, so wrong. But luckily we love the exposed floorboards underneath. And they're actually in pretty good nick. All we need to do now is decide if we want to go down the sanding or painting route. Either way, the end result will look SO much better than our old, stained, BEIGE carpet. Beige. What on earth were we thinking??

There is so much more I could write about, but Dan will be back with Alessi any minute and this post is plenty long enough already. Well done if you've made it this far!