Wednesday, 30 December 2015

Feed the the bastards stop staring at you

It's that time of year again. Pigeons have been pecking around the garden looking for something other than moss and discarded footballs to eat. Our resident blackbird has been pecking at the remaining crab apples, giving me the eye in a manner as if to say "sort it out Kim" and even though there has been no food to tempt them, we've had the odd blue tit visiting the bird feeders.

So I caved. Partly because I fear the wrath of those tiny birds, but mainly because I'll try anything that will keep Alessi entertained for more than a minute. And as it turns out, playing with dried up meal worms falls in to that category. Which reminds me;

THERE ARE PICTURES OF MEAL WORMS IN THIS POST. If you don't like bugs, (or more specifically crunchy worm husks), you might want to click away now.

So, right. Back to the bird cake. Essentially it's just throwing a block of lard and bird food in to a bowl and mixing it all together.

Don't forget to make earrings with the pine cones if you use them. This is a very important part of the bird cake making process. 

As is singing 'Let it Go' at the top of your voice.*

Chipped nail varnish is optional.

Leftovers can be frozen, although I kind of wish I'd added mine to the pine cones first as it would have made things a lot easier later on. Hey ho.

And there you have it. Here are our homemade bird feeders, in all their fatty, wormy glory. Don't they look absolutely disgusting good?

The birds had better eat the flipping lot.

* When will this song DIE??!

Monday, 28 December 2015

Christmas 2015

Did you all have a good Christmas?

We had a lovely, low-key affair this year, just the three of us. Lots of food, a bit of Christmas telly, multiple games of Hungry Hippos and an overwhelming desire to nap on the sofa. Unfortunately we were denied the naps, but that's OK. We probably wouldn't have been able to sleep long anyway what with the constant sing offs between Alessi's bastard Elsa and Anna dolls which are motion activated.

We didn't think this would be a problem as we had assumed they would also come with off switches. Well they do, but we didn't find them until well in to the afternoon. Such. Fun.
Thankfully during our stay in Wales, my Dad introduced me to the wonders of the Snowball so I just made sure the drink was never far from my hand.
Besides she wasn't the only one who was over the moon with her presents. Dan bought me a bread maker, something that's been on my wish list for yonks. If you follow me on Twitter you'll know that I nerded out slightly. I made a simple white loaf to have alongside dinner and we scarfed the lot.

Today I'm testing out it's cake making abilities with a banana loaf. Then there's a long list, cheese and bacon loaf, pizza loaf, coffee cake, pitta bread..I LOVE THIS THING! Oh and her name is Hilda.

Moving on.

Boxing Day meant two things. Leftovers and cabin fever. We don't actually have much of the former as we are a family of gannets, but cabin fever had well and truly set in, with Alessi especially, so we went for a walk for some well needed fresh air. That was followed by a park pit stop to make absolutely sure that she was good and worn out. She was. In fact we all were so the rest of the afternoon and evening was pretty mellow after that.

And that was Christmas 2015. Certainly not Marks and Sparks ad worthy, but then when a company tries to turn even the humble Christmas sofa nap in to something that can be packaged and sold, that can only be a good thing.


Tuesday, 22 December 2015

Nothing to see here, just a cheeky little update

Just two more days until Christmas and I'm ready to settle in and enjoy it.
I have my woolly socks at the ready and I'm ready to cocoon myself and do nothing. Or at least as little as Alessi and Dan will let me get away with anyway.

I found out last week that Dan has never seen Mary Poppins so we're going to attempt a family film viewing which is basically an excuse to sit down and slob. 
I say we'll attempt it, but I suspect it will end up being me watching it on my own,  singing along to 'Feed the Birds' until Alessi comes over and plants a sticky hand over my mouth to shut me up.

Speaking of birds, I'm planning on making some bird cupcakes with Alessi tomorrow and I am perhaps more excited about this than of Christmas itself. 
I've been bad at putting out any kind of food for the birds since summer and I miss them. I miss any kind of wildlife to be honest, I'd almost be happy to see a slug these days. I am definitely a frustrated country bumpkin, trying to fit as much into my postage stamp of a garden as I can. If only Dan would let me get chickens again!

As he desperately wants another cat however, I suspect no one will be getting anything!


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