Four

She's longer, leaner and a hell of a lot sassier than she was this time last year.

Still very much in to Frozen and all things princessy, but this doesn't irk me the way it once did. She's confident and has a healthy outlook so if she wants to wear a princess dress and sing Let it Go (that song will not fucking die) then I'm not going to stop her.
In fact what irk me that it's ok for girls to do what the boys do, but god forbid a little boy put on a tutu or play with a doll. So I've decided that if Alessi wants to embrace all things that are traditionally 'girly', fuck it. She is a girl and that's not something to be ashamed of. If we make being a girly girl to seem like such a bad thing to our kids at such a young age then maybe we are as much a part of the problem as those idiots that say "no she can't". But I'm veering wildly off track, so I will save that rant for another day.

She had her first proper party this weekend, complete with bouncy castle, cocktail sausages and friends from nursery. It was crazy and I barely saw her in the tea making/food organising haze. Those moments where I did snatch a glance at her, what I saw made me so happy. There she was, confident and happy, surrounded by her friends and just being Roo. A happy kid.

Some of the things she loves at the moment are:

Brown Bear, her ever faithful partner in crime and squashy pillow
Cheese, forever with the cheese
Disney princesses (current faves include Elsa, Anna and Merida)
Playing with her dolls house
Shopkins
Stickers
Fighting her Dad. He barely gets in from work before "DADDY, FIGHT!"
And luckily for me, cuddles. May she never grow out of those

And for balance, some things that she's not so keen on:

Carrots
Jeans (or any trousers that aren't leggings - too lumpy)
Socks
Clothes that are brown
Wearing pants
Having her hair brushed

In just over five months she starts school. Holy shit. Moving on quickly..

Happy birthday my little firecracker. Love your face to the moon and back.
xoxoxoxox

Little Dash

I usually post first thing in the morning, but I couldn't wait to share this.
I'm having a warm and fuzzy moment right now and I want to share more of these on my blog seeing as it's precisely what I created it for in the first place.

When I was pregnant with Alessi, every week I would look up how big she was supposed at that stage. 
Every Monday when I got into work, the first thing I would do was look at the pregnancy app on my phone, pull out a ruler and draw a line of the same size on a post it note. 
Then I'd stick it to my computer screen and pray that the tiny little speck in my stomach kept on growing. 

I have a distinct snap-shot type memory of looking at one such post it. The line I'd drawn was only a few millimetres wide. That's all she was, a few millimetres. A little dash on a post it note.

Then tonight, after I put her to bed I got up to leave the room and stopped. As I looked down at her all stretched out and sound asleep, the memory of those post it notes came flooding back and I was in awe how something so small and so fragile could become something so big and fearless and well, Alessi. She's a real force of nature that one and a million miles away from a small dash on a post it note.

And then I wondered how many post it notes it would take to draw her line today. It made me smile.
I don't mind time passing or her growing bigger. Sometimes it seems to happen at a speed that scares me a little but mostly, like tonight, I just feel incredibly happy and grateful that I get to watch her grow up at all. 

My little dash.

Alessi - 2 Years

Alessi, (or Pip as I still often call her) is two. When I was pregnant I just couldn't visualise myself with a baby. Whenever I looked into our future, I imagined a toddler. A toddler running around and talking. I imagined the girl she is now. But the image I had in my head wasn't nearly as good as this.

She makes me laugh every day, she surprises me everyday and she exhausts me every day. So far this morning she has asked for a puppy, a dragon and a purple car.
She's chased me around trying to lick my face (no I don't know how we keep passing these illnesses to each other either - it's a mystery).

And she's picked out her own clothes even though I thought the combo I'd got together actually looked pretty fabulous. She clearly disagreed. A fully fledged member of the fashion police that one.

At two she loves:

• Peppa Pig, which I hate
• Sarah and Duck, which I also love
• Raisins
• Cheese
• Her boots
• Outside..any where as long as it's outside
• The park, especially the "big slide"
• Dogs
• Puddles
• Colours, especially purple
• Jumping on Mummy's and Daddy's bed
• Drawing. On anything. As can be seen by looking at our livingroom walls
• Being read to
• My wedding ring (obsessed)
• Ladybirds
• Swimming with Daddy

She doesn't love:

• Having her face washed
• Having her hair washed
• Or brushed
• Being cooped up indoors
• Mushrooms
• Having sticky hands
• Naps

There's so much more I could write, but for the sake of brevity I'll finish here.

Keep being awesome my little Pip. Although, feel free to drop the face licking any time you want. 

X

Alessi - 1 year

Well here it is. The kid is a year old. I thought I would be sad, but instead I feel really happy that she's got to this point. It's as though we've reached the ultimate milestone. We had this kid and we've managed not to break her for an entire year. I feel like our Health Visitor ought to come by with a medal for us both. Or an "I've been a competent parent this year" sticker, or something.

We didn't make too big a deal of it being her birthday. We just spent it as a family going to the zoo (she LOVED the fish), playing with balloons, eating cake and just partaking in some general silly behaviour..as if we ever needed an excuse. Then, when she was tucked up in bed and we saw the clock hit 9.15pm, we gave each other a celebratory high five.

The past year has been the greatest year I've ever had. It's also been the hardest. It's no lie that a baby changes everything and even the most solid of relationships can take a knock, ours being no exception. You get through it, but bloody hell, it's scary to look back at my pre-Pip days and see just how much has changed. It's probably a good thing we all go into this with blinkers on. Ignorance is bliss and all that.

It's always been my intention to only write these monthly updates for Alessi's first year. So this will be the last one. On that note, here's what she's been doing this past month:-

• Stands unaided for short periods of time
• Takes a few steps unaided
• She loves to brush her teeth (and mine)
• Can brush her hair - albeit in to her face
• Sign a little when she's hungry, wants to be picked up, wants to know what or where something is etc
• Understands some words like "bottle", "mummy", "daddy", "juice", "clap", "hi" and "bye bye"
• And last, but not least, we now have the occasional meltdown when we won't let her do something she wants to do, like go into the kitchen when we're cooking. This is still in the cute stages at the moment, but I'm dreading the time when it'll kick up a notch. At the moment it's just lying flat on the floor, having a little whinge and then ,with a little distraction, forgetting about it. I know I shouldn't laugh when she does this, sometimes though, it's hard. :)

And now because I've feeling all loved up and emotional, here's an Alessi themed photo dump. Enjoy.

I think the face says it all.

And that's it folks. Here's to another awesome year..but perhaps with more sleep and fewer illnesses?

A girl can dream.

Alessi - 11 months

She's almost a year old. Woah.

This has been the month where she got her first real illness. Nursery has been a bitter-sweet addition to her life. On the one hand, she's flourishing there. She's so sociable with everyone, much more relaxed and less shy than she was and she's learning new things from copying the other babies too. 

On the other hand however, as it the way with new babies and nurseries, she's been collecting all the colds and viruses going. The low point was when she caught a viral infection and conjunctivitis or as I like to call it, the oh-my-god-your-eyes-are-gross virus. 

I missed work to look after her, then I came down with it and Dan had to miss work to look after the both of us. We were a grim house then let me tell you. 

All we've had since are mild colds and coughs which I can deal with - fingers crossed it stays that way.

She's taken her first steps and the other day when I turned around to face her she was standing in front of me by herself with a big  proud smile on her face. I was so shocked and I can't believe that even though I was sat just two feet away from her, I still managed to miss it. Oh and she can climb stairs and other things too. 

Basically, it won't be long before nothing in the house is safe from her and I'll be running around again with the "no Alessi" and the "don't touch Alessi" and the "where the bloody hell have you gone Alessi?"

She also had her first trip to the dentist today. She wouldn't show him her teeth for love nor money, but absolutely loved watching me get mine checked. Toad.

And that's it pretty much. The changes have been few this month and yet they've been biggies. 

These children, they grow up so fast.

Alessi - 10 months

This kid is no longer a baby.

And we have teeth! Two of the little beauties. These are making eating so much easier for her now so we're no longer restricted to mashed and steamed stuff. These days her favourite foods are chicken, sweet peppers, dried apricots, apples and raisins - LOVES raisins. She's still not a fan of yoghurt  seems to hate banana and isn't over keen on anything sticky. Such pickiness from a girl who was eating live insects not too long ago.

As well as continuing to storm around the house like the little whirlwind that she is, she's now started talking. In her own way anyway. She knows what she's saying even if we don't, but hearing her happily babble away to herself is my new happy.

This week I returned to work. It's only two days each week, but I was worried about how Pip would be. Turns out, she loves it. There's been no tears at all, no worried looking around for me or becoming quiet and withdrawn after being thrust into a new environment. My instincts told me that she would love it, that she would thrive being with other babies, but I had thought it would take time to get there. Two days in and even more inquisitive and standing almost unaided after trying to copy some of the older children. I'm absolutely gobsmacked.
Having her being so relaxed in her new environment has been liberating for me too as I've been able to switch off mum mode for a while and just be in the office around my old work buddies without worrying myself stupid. By the end of the day I'm ready to get back to her and it's all just made me realise that while I struggled at the beginning, I'm really loving this motherhood thing now. It's kinda cool.

Alessi - 9 months

I'm exhausted.

I was warned by a lot of people that when Pip became mobile she'd be off and I'd discover a new kind of tired. Some of those people even told me with a hint of glee in their voice and a gleam in their eye, so to you I say this.
Bastards.

I mean this isn't exactly new, she was doing this last month, it's just that now she's gotten stronger and faster. I literally can't keep up. She spends the majority of her day on her feet and it annoys her no end that she can't walk unaided. As for me, unaided walking can take it's sweet time. Just having Pip cruising bombing around all day long is causing no end of trouble. We've had to block the Christmas tree in to a corner using both sofas. Our attempts at baby proofing have been a flop. They're simply not Pip proof.

She understands no. Does she always listen to it though? Ironically, no.
Most of the time, if I say no,she listens, but other times she'll just go ahead and do it anyway. And if she's feeling really cheeky she'll even turn around to me, smile, wave and then go back to whatever she was doing. It's all I can do not to crack a smile and start laughing at her goofiness. How do you start with the discipline when they just make you crack up each time??

Waving is her new favourite thing and if she hears someone saying "bye bye" on the TV she'll turn and wave to them She gives Dan a wave goodbye each morning. She's also learnt to clap so whenever she's done something she's proud of she'll give herself a little congratulatory clap. Like yesterday, she caught her own lunch. She spied a woodlouse, popped it into her mouth and gave herself a clap. This is the first woodlouse she's actually eaten. The other two I managed to fish out. Like I said earlier though, I can't keep up any more!

This photo has nothing to do with waving or woodlice, but it's here because I love it. 

She's a rowdy little goof, shouting and squealing to herself or blowing raspberries constantly. Noise is now a constant in this house and I'm trying to take it all in as this is our last month together before I return to work. It'll only be two days a week and I think it'll be great for Pip. She's so active and sociable, I think having a couple of days away from me and Dan each week will really kick start her independence and help her personality flourish.

But until then, I'll spend my time trying desperately to take photos of the little pickle that aren't blurry!

Alessi - 8 months

I'm fairly sure I only wrote her last update post yesterday, but the calendar assures me that Pip is now eight months old so here we go.

What can I say? In short she's crawling with confidence to the closest piece of furniture and pulling herself up. There she will stand until her legs get too tired, then she will sit down with a bump, have a little grizzle, play with something (most likely to be something she's not supposed to, phone, remote, laptop etc) and do it all over again.

If I'm sat on the sofa, she'll take a break from playing with her toys, crawl over, pull herself up and depending on her mood either rest her head in my lap (aww) or blow a raspberry on my knee (....aww). Unless of course, I'm on this thing in which case she will decide that she wants to play too.

This month also saw her get her first cold. Now I can put up with a lot of disgustingness from babies, but nose goo is not one of them. Unfortunately the dreaded snot sucker was needed daily and I heaved almost daily as a result. Our house reeks of Olbas Oil although I shouldn't complain, it's about the only thing that's enabled us all to get any sleep.
So that's a first that I didn't care too much for. Here's hoping it'll be sometime before we have any other illnesses to contend with. What with it being winter though, I fear I'm being overly optimistic.

She's such a goof and her personality is really shining through now. It's fun to see what kind of person she's becoming, the things she loves (her kazoo) and the things she doesn't (strawberry yogurt - strange child).

And here she is one last time. Pippy the Ham.

Alessi - 7 months

Well she's found forward gear!

For the past month she's been shuffling around backwards. Grizzling with frustration at not being able to go the other way, or during the (many) times she found herself stuck under the sofa bed in the sewing room.

But now my little babba has done it and yes, I am knackered as a result, thank you.
Bless her though she gets so proud of herself. I'll get this look as if to say, "look mum! I just crawled over to the the nappy changing basket and pulled everything out while you were looking the other way. Am I smart or what?!"
Yes my darling girl, you're a genius. Now stop eating the wet wipes.

Other developments, my girl's got moves! She looks like she's playing with an invisible hula hoop. That or she's having some kind of seizure, but it's hellish cute either way.
She's also found her voice properly too. Gone are the days of the Mariah Carey squeal. That was so two months ago. She's finally playing with sounds like "la", "ma", "da" and an odd, but too cute clicking sound with her tongue. You know the noises. The usual baby babble noises that parents think are amazing, but other people, not so much.
She's also going to be a musical genius as she can play the kazoo. I know. I'm so proud. Unfortunately like the invisible hula hooping, there's no video evidence of this either, but take my word for it. She's a kazoo playing genius.

Elvis lives.

Alessi - 6 months

She's laughing!

Well yeah, sort of. It turns out that, that old man style cough she's been doing sporadically over the past couple of months wasn't her gearing up for laughing, that was her actual laugh. Now she's doing it on a regular basis so I guess she's been there for some time. Clearly we just weren't very funny a few months ago. Now it seems, we're bloody hilarious.

This month has been utterly mental as far as changes are concerned. There's been so many I've struggled to keep up. She can now sit unsupported, roll over and stand (holding on to someone to balance her). She soaks up everything she can and she is so, so smiley.

Her favourite things are blowing raspberries, squealing and her glow worm toy

The weaning is going nicely. She's loved everything she's been given so far except peas and is now having a breakfast and dinner each day. Like most kids she hates the clean up and it's a bloody nightmare if she gets food in her hair so her hairband is more important that her bib during mealtimes.

Speaking of hair, it's growing quickly at the moment and finally losing that Ellie Goulding shaved look to the side of her head. The down side is that it's a complete nightmare to tame. I have to confess there are days that I don't bother.

Unfortunately that's all I've got time for (thank fook for that I hear you cry), as we're heading to Wales again tomorrow and I'm supposed to be packing. So while I go and do that, I'll leave you with this random video of the little guppy doing what she does best.

Alessi - 5 months

Another month, another post.

Still no laughter. If you pretend to bite her toes or tummy she'll break out in the biggest grin and come out with an old man cough, but that's it.

She's on the verge of getting mobile. She can't quite roll over yet, but she's working on it. I am both excited and dreading it.

She's also finding her voice. From Mariah Carey style squeals to blowing raspberries she's finally learning that grizzle noises aren't the only noise she can make. Thank god.

The teething continues to chug along quietly. We have constant, CONSTANT drool which gets everywhere. It's like living with a Saint Bernard.

This week we start weaning. I know it's early, but she's ready. We first tried her with a couple of samples that came through the post, baby porridge and fruit puree and yesterday I gave her some baby rice. She went nuts for all of them so today we start for real. Just as soon as I can be bothered to make some apple puree.

She no longer hates being left on her tummy now that she can lift her head up properly. You can see her trying to figure out how to move forward, but instead she just ends up spinning around in circles.

She pretty much lives in bodies and tights these days. With the unpredictable and often crappy weather we've had this past month, it's just easier and more practical.

And that hair..that crazy hair that I love so much is getting longer by the day. That's more hair to stick up at all angles. Hair that won't be tamed no matter what we try.

The answer?

Take her tights off her legs and stick them on her head. 

Thank you husband for that genius idea. 

I think that she's starting a new phase with her daytime naps too. For the last month or so she's been having regular naps that you could set your watch by. I was grateful for these as they were pretty much the only chance I got to sew. 

But for the past few days, she's been going longer between sleeps. I'm guessing this is perfectly normal, but if I'm honest, I'm a bit gutted. Those half an hour naps were my chance to reboot, recharge and just catch my breath. 

Ah well. I'm sure we'll both feel more settled once we get our heads around this new phase. It's the figuring them out that can be a little stressful. 

She's actually down right now and as it took an age to get her there I really ought to blast my to do list while I can. See you next month for another update, hopefully it will start with "she's laughing!".